A year……my random blathering

A year has passed.  It’s hard to believe.  Some days it seems like a life time, some days it seems like a minute but it has been one year.  A loss to our village, a crack in our foundation.  It’s a team missing that one player.

The kids are out of school…..the memories are so bittersweet.  The kids did not all jump into the pool together with us yelling and counting (and then re-doing it because someone pushed Tay in).  They are older, we were busy, it was not the same.  Things change and this I know.  Change is good but some change is hard to move on from.  We were friends, fellow moms, teens at heart.  We did not always see eye to eye, the next day it was forgotten and we all were there for one another.  So in some regards it is not fair but it’s a little thing we call life.  We move on the best we can.  We learn and know that we are doing the best we can every day with what we know.  The kids grow, flourish and are under the watchful eye of so many.

If we had one more day….I would not call you to have dinner (well because you know you would have to fix it for me)…..I would do what we are doing tonight.  Happy hour, in the back yard, glasses raised.  I am making our special chips and onion dip (with love) and of course there will be chicken dip.  We may get lucky and Kelly will bring her special goldfish but I hope not the Woven Wheats.  It won’t be the same but you would tell us to get over it and move on.  Click our glasses and put on our big girl pants.  You meant so much to so much and were the kick in all our pants………..

I share this again with tears in my eyes…..because to all my girlfriends I love you dearly and could not do it without you.  Our daily group texts are that kick in the pants I need to keep on keeping on.  It’s that inside joke that puts a smile on my face after a long day.  Or just the safe place to complain and clink a virtual glass.

When the Words Fail me…………



12 thoughts on “A year……my random blathering

  1. Sorry for your loss! The loss of a friend is such a hard thing to overcome and it hurts a little each day! That moment when you think “Oh, I need to call ***! or ***would love this!” is a tough time. Know that she is there with you in spirit every day! When things are rough she is beside you helping you cope! ((HUGS))

  2. I feel your sadness and well I remember your pain a year ago Tracy. So sudden, so unexpected. Very thankful you have your girlfriends – yesterdays and todays. Special seasons – with special people. You are blessed. Love your memories – they are beautiful. Each day when I wake up, I thank God for the gift of another day and pray that my family and friends be protected and happy. Joi philosophy: Yesterday’s wisdom brings today’s delight and tomorrow’s dreams. Xj.

  3. OMGoodness I’m sobbing!!! What a beautiful, sweet and heartfelt post! What a beautiful picture of wonderful friends that’s bond is thick and true! So sweet Tracy!! Sending you some big HUGS!!!

  4. I remember this time a year ago…… The chat we had via Facebook messenger….. How you wouldn’t Skype with me cause you were a mess. I value that chat. I value your friendship and getting to know you over the past couple of years via our art/clink dates, your friend would have very much valued you. You are that positive force that keeps pushing forward….. Who has her priorities very clearly mapped out and doesn’t sway too far too the right or left of them. You know what is important….. Your family and your village. Chin up my friend. Your heart may be heavy today but those beautiful smiles will shine through as you remember the amazing times you have with your amazing friend. Clink and love you!

  5. Sorry for your loss. I have lost several best friends from childhood, and that was many years ago. The one I miss the most is my mother/friend. She lived far away but we called each other a lot. I still want to pick up the phone everyday and call her. I don’t think that will ever go away. We called each other a lot over the years I have been gone. I only got to go visit her a couple of times a year and not even that in the last several years except for the year before she died. I managed, thanks to my brothers help, to get up to see her one last time. She has been gone five years and it is not any easier. I do have the hope of seeing her again someday. Someday is getting closer. Hugs.

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